Watch the Bullying, Ladies

It turns out men are equal-opportunity bullies spreading the boorish behavior to men and women, but women bully other women.

An estimated 54 million people say they have been bullied at work, according to a 2007 survey by Zogby International, and more than 70% of the bullying is women bullying other women, according to the Workplace Bullying Institute.

Good Morning America shared those stats in a story this morning. (http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Story?id=6943347&page=1)

Two things were truly bothersome with the GMA story today.

The first was the 70% stat shared. Are those bullies afraid to speak that way to men? Do they not see how mean their behavior is? Do they let their children behave that way? Women leaders need to be aware of how they come across to employees, no matter what level they are.

Part of being Emotionally Intelligent is understanding the impact you have on others. Employees will not give 100% effort to people who belittle, badger, or bully them. These days, when workforces are thin, most companies need all the effort they can get.

The other bothersome component of the story was the "bully roundtable" included. Women who were trying to learn about their bullying behavior are part of a "bully roundtable." GMA showed three or four of the women airing their comments about not realizing they were bullies. The women said the right things, and if one reads the article linked it looks like they get it. But, their body language and voice tones come across as flippant and condescending.

I wondered if those women are in the roundtable because their HR department forced them to be there. Clearly, they do not get it. Clearly, they are not going to change when left on their own. Clearly, women who work with the women in the story will continue to be treated poorly.

It's too bad they don't get it.

Those women, and women like them, are giving the rest of us a bad name. We're ladies. I'm not going to say what those bullies are, but let's say "witches." Next time one of them wonders how her workplace reputation as a "witch" was started, I hope she looks in the mirror and sees the truth.